Saturday, July 21, 2012


    I don't believe that people really change.  They may spruce up their outward appearance, filter their words, and mask their malicious intentions, but they never really change.  I believe in evolution, though.  I evolve every day.  With new experiences, I gain new understandings.  And if I'm of a mood, I am actually capable of learning from past mistakes, failures and triumphs. 

   One day I will champion an alternate cause because I'm a sucker for an under-dog, or I love playing Devil's advocate.  The next day I will champion the opposite position just to keep my nearest and dearest on their toes.  Really, I just enjoy a good argument. 

   So- beware of anyone who comes to you telling you how much they have changed.  It might take some time, but you'll figure it out the hard way.  Either they were lying to you before, or they are lying to you now.  And that's my helpful life survival tip of the day.  You're welcome!

Friday, July 20, 2012


    From time to time, I'm actually shocked and awed by the cruelty of the human race.  Let me rephrase- maybe people have always been unreasonably cruel to each other and the advent of international, cheap, easily accessed media have brought more public awareness.  Either way, we live in some bad times.

   We hear of substance abuse, elder abuse, child abuse, animal abuse, spousal abuse- the nightly news is a horror story of irrational behavior!  Some murder is warranted, I suppose.  Like self-defense, you're protecting yourself or your family from harm.  It's violent, but sometimes it's necessary for good to triumph over evil to keep the universal scales in balance. 

    Today, I heard about the 'Colorado Theatre' shootings.  What a sorrowful, pointless waste of human lives!  Why would someone want or plan to do such a cruel thing to complete strangers?  My thoughts and prayers are with the families of the people involved in the shooting.  I couldn't imagine such a tragedy!

    I keep hoping that the human race can learn from our macabre past mistakes, but I don't think it's going to happen.  This is a terrible, horrible place and time to live in, folks. 

Tuesday, July 17, 2012


    This is the dawn of a new age.  Well, I wouldn't really say it's the dawn- more like mid-morning brunch- of the technological era.  We have online banking, TIVO, security cameras at every intersection, cars that start themselves with the click of a key chain, government-budgeted mosquito spies for urban areas, e-mail, and e-readers.  All of those things have slowly replaced the old infrastructure of paper product trails or doing things 'the old fashioned way'.

     Admittedly, E-mail is more handy, but the sheer volume and popularity of this form of communication has put pressure on the postal service.  Small offices are shutting down and more people are losing their jobs.  I don't think it's a good idea to get rid of this already-established infrastructure because of technology scares like the Y2K cluster F.  But, that's just me.  I can see that e-mailing is faster and it saves trees. 

    E-books are good and bad.  In no way do I wish to see tablets and e-readers replace paperbacks on my bookshelf.  Yes e-reading is more convenient and it saves money.  But don't you miss the way a book feels in your hands?  I guess you could say that an e-reader would save you from having people comment on the dirty smut book you're reading because the cover wouldn't be shining.  Also, you wouldn't have to be ashamed of all those yucky, boring Harry Potter books you love to read.  You could hide them on your Kindle instead of under your couch somewhere. 

    The definite downside of e-reading is for authors.  Even five years ago, an author could solicit a publishing house via query letter, synopsis, and manuscript and then either become published or receive a form rejection letter.  Now, having your manuscript accepted is only the first hoop you have to jump through.  The second hoop is now e-publishing.  Publishing houses can take more risks on new authors by extending them digital publication as a sort of Permit Driver session.  They use this new medium to test the marketability of new authors.  This can be an advantage because you can land a digital contract instead of a rejection letter, but it doesn't mean as much (to me) to not have something physical published.  I don't like being a guinea pig.

     That being said, I would be an idiot to turn down a digital contract.  I can see that it is a gateway to paperback publishing and establishing myself as a respectable author.  So, like a lot of things in life, it's a necessary evil to get to where I'm going.  So wish me luck as I embark on e-book publishing and wherever those winds take me!  Also, I'm going to need a Nook or Kindle or something I guess.  God help me!
:.Pretend to study textbooks while reading something interesting!.:

Monday, July 16, 2012

Sexist Advertising

   While watching television tonight, I couldn't help but notice a lot of dieting advertisements-probably due to this being the summer/bathing suit season.  Most notably was Jenny Craig and Nutrisystem. I'm sure that these are helpful organizations that have helped countless men and women reach and maintain their healthy weight or whatever- but their advertising is a little passive aggressive.

     They use subtle hints to brainwash you into buying into their Snake Oil programs like I'm finally happy. or I was so lonely when I was fat.  Now I have a man!  That's not really a ver-batum  quote or anything- but you catch my drift.  I didn't like the insinuation that you have to be skinny to be happy.  I'm curvy and I'm happy.  I know skinny, sad people who would love to take a bite out of my cheeseburger (And no, that isn't an innuendo, but it is funny).  Even pretty people are sad and depressed.

      Commercials and advertisements are targeted to certain types of groups.  You can tell by the actors in their infomercial, who the makers or products expect to buy their stuff.  Sometimes it's a practical approach, you wouldn't see men in a Kotex commercial raving about how wonderful their tampons are. 

       In the spirit of this post, I have a fantastical idea for a Divorce Attorney commercial.
                               "Thanks to Jessicca Collins, attorney at law, I lost 200 pounds in one month and I've never been happier!" Says a grinning woman holding a picture of her irritating, useless husband.
                             Visa versa with a relieved husband holding a picture of his nagging wife.
                It's brilliant!  I really wish I was a divorce attorney now.

:.Now Pay Me $2500.  You're welcome!.:

Sunday, July 15, 2012


     We all need to aspire to something.  It's healthy to strive toward greater heights- as long as you don't place unreasonable expectations on yourself.  For example, I will never be a painter and have my artwork displayed in posh museums and all that.  But, I feel that becoming a popular romance writer is within reason.

     While I was editing my first novel, City of Sin, Connor asked me what I was doing and why I was doing it.  I told him I wanted to send my book in for publication *keeping my fingers eternally crossed* because I wanted to better our lives and be famous.  No problem with killing two birds with one stone, right?

    He asked me what I would do if they bought my book and I thought for a minute.  I recalled a day, a couple of months ago, when we were watching television and a promotional travel commercial for Australia came on.  Connor said he wanted to go see the 'Kang-roos' and the Great Whites.  So, now I've decided that if I land a big, reliable contract, Connor and I will board a plane for Australia where we will visit Steve Irwin's zoo and hopefully not get eaten by ravenous, Great White Sharks.  Australia is a pretty dangerous place!

:. Connor & I Will See This One Day! .:

Shameless Self-Promotion

As a part of my promotional obligations, I have created a Facebook Author & Promotional page for me.  Once I have my promotional material/ cover art for my Short Story, I'll post all of it there since my personal Facebook page is set to Super-Duper Private. 

Thank you guys so much for supporting me.  And thank you in advance for buying lots of my writings and leaving me rave reviews and suggesting my page to all of your friends, family, co-workers, frienemies, etc.

:. I'm always working hard- or is it hardly working? .:

Friday, July 13, 2012

Kindred Spirits

      I've always felt a kindred spirit to Lions.  I hate cats- they're the Devil reincarnate.  But I've always been drawn to Lions.  They're predators and downright scary-looking.  Not something you want to trifle with.

    They have intelligent, accessing eyes and regal dispositions.  I admire both qualities.  Also, I want to make people jump and quiver in terror when they hear me ROAR.  I'm not sure what that says about my psyche.  What do you think?

    What's your kindred animal spirit?  Come on people, don't be shy!

Sunday, July 8, 2012

Big News

     I have some Big News (obviously) to share with my adoring public.  Yours truly has been contracted through Secret Cravings Publishing for my short story Bi-Curious.  Projected release is September 2012!

    I'll share more developments as they become available to me.  Love you all and I expect you to buy copies of my work and lots more for friends and family! 


Home Remedies

      I am such a puss when it comes to pain.  I had a friend in college who played volleyball.  Inevitably, she would break a finger or two. She could set her fingers back in place and splint them on her own.  No pain medicine.  No doctors.  I can stub my pinkie toe and cry for days.

     I've had the beginnings of a sinus infection/ tooth ache since yesterday.  How can something as tiny as a tooth bring  you to the brink of insanity with pain?  I've considered bashing my own skull in to get some relief.  Luckily, I have some old home remedies to aid my journey for pain relief.

     You can gargle salt water for a sore throat or to draw infection out of a wound or an infected tooth.  OR you go and get some good, low quality, high-proofed, rock gut whiskey---and you drink the WHOLE bottle!  After that, you forget you have a face!  So, hope this helps!

:. It's the Party-Sized Bottle.  Party of One!.:


Monday, July 2, 2012

Magic Mike Receives My HOT Rating!

             My friend Liz and I went to watch Magic Mike tonight.  I knew I was going to see half-naked men dance around, but I was unprepared for the carnal pleasure of watching really hot men dance!  Oh my goodness!  It must have been 110 degrees in that theatre!

           I've decided that men get an unfair wrap.  Yes, they're bad for oogling women and commenting on how hot they are, their perky body parts, and even issuing the occasional cat call.  But, the women in the theatre with me were A LOT worse.  I think that if a halfway decent-looking man would have stumbled into the cinema with his shirt off, we would have mauled him.  The poor cinema custodians will be scrubbing the estrogen off the walls for months!

          Women act like men are animals when they comment on other women, and I guess it is an animal instinct to strut around and splay your feathers for you prospective mate.  At least they're honest, I guess.  Women tend to be more reserved when it comes to commenting on men's assets.  Speaking of assets...Matthew Mcconaughey- WOW!

:. 0_0 .:
         The men and the muscles and the prancing- oh, boy!  We had heard that the movie's story line wasn't very good and the acting was terrible.  Consensus says --"There was a story line?"  What do you expect when you go and see a movie about male strippers?  You're going for the hot man candy!  I would have been happy to watch them dance around for an hour and a half!

         Inevitably, there were a few guys watching the movie as well.  They didn't look happy to be there, and most of them made it obvious that their wife/girlfriend/ significant other forced them to go.  Poor things.  I spotted some slinking into their seats well after the lights had dimmed.  Probably to avoid any awkward "Are you gay?" comments at work tomorrow.

        I'm definitely putting Magic Mike on my DVD Wish List!  Yum!

:. :D .: